Carl Pavano's mustache has created quite a buzz (probably because we're boring people here in Minnesota)...along with his fashion statement, I've listed some others that we've encountered over the years while watching Minnesota sports:
1. Pavano's Mustache - Not exactly through the roof with creativity, but Carl Pavano was all but dead while "playing" in New York...this not only gives him a pulse, but a personality too.
2. Mitch Lee's shaved champaign glass in the side of his head - He came out with the new hairstyle after being acquitted of rape charges for all to see on the basketball court. Then followed that up with a similar sexual assault charge in Madison, WI. They don't grow 'em any dumber than this.
3. Mauer's Sideburns - Once again, not exactly an earth shattering trend...but, Gardy told me I had to chalk him up in the three hole.
4. Vikings' AFRO's - The receiving trio of Randy Moss, Kelly Campbell and Nate Burleson took out their braids and rocked the Afro's against the Chiefs in 2003.
5. Stanley Robert's "Thug Love" tattoo - Not exactly a fashion, more of a way of life in the jungle we call 'Sota.
6. Jared Allen's Mullet - It takes some balls to rock a mullet out in public. I attempted this back in my college years in 2001-02...and I couldn't do it...if I left the house, I always had to double team the mullet with a hat and a hooded sweatshirt, before I finally shaved it off. I salute you, Jared.
7. Kevin McHale's ugly sweaters - Does anything scream MINNESOTA more than men wearing multi-colored sweaters, with over the top geometric shape patterns on them? That alone could be the reason why free agents never wanted to come here to play...seizures gone wild.
8. Scott Erickson's low stirrups - No one in Minnesota was sporting the "wear the baseball pants low/showing no white socks through your stirrups" look before Scott Erickson arrived. I remember having to double or triple loop the bottom of my stirrups around my toes in order to make this work for my little league games...this would result in cutting off all blood circulation in my feet...but, it was all worth it.
9. Willie Burton's Mask - With a broken nose, Willie Burton had to sport a facial mask...not one of those high tech clear ones that appear to be really light...it was clunky looking, and had brown padding around it which made it resemble an old school hockey mask (which could of have also been a mask for a serial killer). His play did not suffer during this stretch either...in fact, it was probably his best stretch of basketball on the collegiate level.
10. Alex Burnett's bullpen backpack - This is kind of a low key one...but, I've noticed Burnett tote a backpack after games that is made out of some kind of brown fur (definitely animal related). You're not scoring any points with PETA.
11. Monson's sponsored sport coat - On several occasions during actual games, Dan Monson rocked a sport coat with an endorsement for Century 21...at least, you could have endorsed a product that basketball is somewhat affiliated with...and he wanted our basketball program to be taken seriously...??
12. Laettner's middle part/head band combo - The look just kind of fit the arrogant prick.
13. Childress' snowsuit - The images of Bud Grant patrolling the sidelines, wearing just a Vikings baseball cap and a light winter jacket in cold weather are long gone...our current coach bundles up like a three year old if the weather is below 30 degrees.
14. Marko Jaric's hair - Anyone that seems to put product into their hair before they play a game should not be acquired via draft or trade. Wally Szczerbiak almost defied all the odds and became the exception to the rule...but, in the end...he still failed.
15. Favre...the Silver Fox - Not many people can pull off the "gray beard" look in professional sports...mainly, because no one remains relevant in the sporting world for that length of time.
SBG
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