I've decided to play Guidance Counselor for some of the athletes in the Minnesota sports scene...because quite frankly, for some of you...your playing days will be coming to an end quickly...And it's always good to have a back-up plan, especially in this economy.
Nick Punto - Marriage Counselor - No matter what position you play: 2nd, Shortstop, 3B or on the bench...you're always on the mound with Rick Anderson while he is conversing with the pitcher and catcher during a crucial situation. This has served as your internship for rough patches in relationships.
Percy Harvin - City Worker - As long as you can pass the initial drug screen (which wouldn't happen)...you would fit in nicely with this organization. The Government loves worthless people that don't show up to work on a regular basis.
Carlos Gomez - Dance Instructor - I've never seen a more over dramatic crow hop in all of baseball. It's really ugly on the baseball field, but could get rave reviews in the artsy world of dance.
Corey Brewer - Actor - If you were posing as a child in those Feed the Children of Africa ads...I would be donating money towards that cause in a heartbeat. Your legs are freakishly skinny...I get all squirmy just thinking about how easy those could shatter in the wind.
Ray Edwards - Boxing Promoter/Politician - You somehow get publicity even though you suck. You say the most ridiculous comments and make outrageous predictions (for example: "I'll break the single season sack record" or "I'd rather have T-Jack than Favre"). You never deliver on anything...and why people waste their time on you is beyond me...
SBG
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